I have been thinking a lot lately...crazy...I know! ;) But I can't seem to shake this thought, so I thought it would best to get it out in writing.
I am really good with meeting new people. I thrive on it. There is just something about meeting someone for the first time; it has an energy all of its own!! What I am absolutely terrible at are "goodbyes." No one ever taught me that part! I have always been more of a "see ya later" type of girl. I never wanted to close any opportunities for future happenings with that person. Especially in relationships!! This is what I have been thinking about the most! How do I say goodbye to someone that I have cared about...but I have no intentions of going any further with them?
People always tell me its better to treat it like a band-aid and just rip it off quick! Maybe it's just me, but have you ever ripped off a band-aid and it stings really badly? If course! But sometimes that sting does not go away right away......the area becomes tender and is sensitive to the touch....the painful pull might have even taken out a few hairs along the way. Although the sore is now exposed, its the burning feeling you are left with once the band-aid is gone. This is where I think to myself, is that really the right way to do this?? Sure give it a while and the pain will stop and your mind starts focusing on something else.
But what if this process could be pain free? What if that band-aid was just left there...its comfortable there. Over time the band-aid will get softer...more or less forgotten about....and the covering will have naturally been loosened up until gentle pull will remove it, or it will just fall off unnoticed. (Ok thinking about band-aids for this long is actually pretty gross!! haha sorry about that!)
So what do I do? Ignore it and let the relationship just...end? Or do I have to hurt someone, but do it quickly?
I don't know what to do. Help??
Honestly Rach, ending a relationship, of any kind, is never going to be pain-free. If you ignore the person and hope that they will eventually forget and move on--there's always going to be that tiny part in their heart that will fester and wonder (which sometimes leads to more pain and heartache in the future).
ReplyDeleteWhereas on the other hand, if you are upfront and say exactly how you feel, it leaves no room for questioning. Yes, the pain will be sharp and immediate, but its easier to get over. They can't get hurt again.
This is my advice.